Let's face it, most of our lessons are caught, not taught, and our own childhood experiences influence the way in which we show up for our kids every single day. Understanding our Inner Childhood Narrative (ICN) is the key to unlocking our ability to create true harmony in our homes and classrooms. As parents and professionals, we are often are unaware of how to support a healthy ICN in ourselves and our kids. So, where do we begin?
What is the 'Inner Childhood Narrative' ICN?
The "Inner Childhood Narrative" ICN, is the script we use to understand ourselves, others, and the world. Forged in childhood, the ICN is the result of our early attachment experiences and is incredibly impactful, whether we know recognize or not, on our ability to cope with stress and interact with others.
ICN gives us a place to start as it describes the outcome of one's primary caregiving experience that shaped the script as we sought 'felt safety' and connection. It conditioned us to develop certain strategies and belief systems that often hinder our authenticity and confidence in adulthood.
Our ICN was developed as we concluded our sense of worth as we experienced the cycle of needs throughout early childhood. We carry these conclusions with us as copying patterns and guideposts for living.
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There are many risk factors that can distort the ICN in childhood such as a stressful prenatal experience, a traumatic or difficult birth, early hospitalization &/or painful procedures, loss of a caregiver (death, adoption, divorce, illness, foster care, incarceration, etc.,) abuse, physical and emotional neglect, and complex developmental trauma.
​Understanding your ICN and its origins, is the first step in self-awareness and in the identification maladaptive coping patterns and false beliefs that may be keeping you from living your best life as your authentic self.
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Without doing this healing work, many are trapped in the brokenness of childhood stories, unable to free themselves or connect to others in a healthy and genuine way. Sadly, many mothers tell me that they find themselves being reactive, angry, and sad in their parenting role and know it is somehow connected to their own childhood but are unsure how to stop the cycle.
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It has been my life's work as a therapist to help children, and
'adult children' recognize and transform their ICN so that they
can break free from limiting beliefs and find new ways to connect to themselves, to others, and to their stories.
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It's not only about what happens in childhood, but how we made sense of what happens, that matters. I believe that every story matters. Whether you're a parent seeking to deepen your connection with your child, an individual looking to heal the "hard places" of your own childhood, or a child navigating the challenges of growing up, welcome!
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Build deeper connections so you can support your child's emotional confidence today...
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